The Unexpected Everything by: Morgan Matson

Genre: Young Adult Fiction, Contemporary
Published: May 3, 2016 by: Simon and Schuster
Pages: 519
Rating: 1/5 stars

Andie was ready to get away for the summer. Away from her distant politician father and his troubling scandals, and away from her sleepy small town that would be far too boring. But when an unexpected turn of events happens, Andie finds herself stuck in her town for the summer, and stuck walking dogs as a job. This summer hasn't turned out how she had planned, but it definitely will be a time for new changes. New loves. New jobs. A new Andie.

This book was over 500 pages of pure shit. Like literally would take this book and stomp on it with my feet, it was worth absolutely nothing to me. Ok, maybe that last part is exaggerating a bit, but seriously, why was this book hyped? If contemporary authors continue to put out bratty, entitled, common-white girl characters in small towns with diners that serve milkshakes as if that's the only god-damn food they have, then count me out. This book got me fired up, and here's why:

First off, every single character in this book sucked. Lets start with Andie, our protagonist. She's a precious little rich girl, the daughter of a politician father who showers her with everything to get over the fact that he's never there for her. Literally, this girl has never been told "no" once in her life. Then her father has a scandal and it's all "woe is me," "daddy's reputation is ruined," "however will he pay for my iphone 12?" I HATE THIS GIRL.

Her friends were boring and flat as well. You had the stationary random Indian girl for diversity, and when I mean random, I mean it, because literally she's the only brown girl in the entire town. Andie's friends dote on her as if she's the only one with problems, and everything has to go back to her. GOD FORBID anyone have a problem worse than Andie, because it will not be touched on.

The plot was boring, unoriginal, and painfully long. You got your typical All-American town, very Riverdale-esque, with waitresses that call everybody "doll," and everybody miraculously knowing each other. Andie meets the cute boy-next door who's visiting with the summer, may I mention that he's a little nerdy, not at ALL like her type, but she will eventually get past the fact that he wants to be a "writer" and decide that he's cute. How thoughtful of you Andie, to put aside your shitty judgement of ones passion and see how hot he can be beneath those glasses.

I was dragged through this book. I wanted to finish it because I felt the need to, but really, I would have saved myself a lot of pain. Everything happened exactly how I knew it was gonna be, and everything was wrapped up nice in pretty in a bow for our protagonist in the end. There was no chemistry, no originality, and nothing prepared me for how long this was gonna be. Save your time, save your money, save your summer.

Have you read The Unexpected Everything? What did you think?

Emily @ Paperback Princess