Conversations is a fortnightly discussion hosted by Geraldine @ Corralling Books and Joan @ Fiddler Blue. Head on over to their blogs for all the information on these posts! This week is about Online Friends vs. Real life Friends
I'm going to get one thing straight, and that is that I find it way easier to talk to people online than I do in person. I am a shy person through and through, and while I will make conversation with people in real life, it is awkward and hard for me to start the conversation. However when I'm online, I feel much more confident and can chat about absolutely anything to my fellow blog buddies. And to be honest, I think I enjoy it more.
This might be weird to say, but at this point in my life I would feel more comfortable telling one of my blog buddies something that's bothering me than one of my friends at school. Now don't get me wrong, I love my school friends and they are so supportive, but I just feel like they don't understand me fully. None of them really know that I blog, or even just how obsessed with reading I actually am. They know I'm a reader, but they don't really know to what extent. Only one of my really good friends knows that I blog.
So what does this have to do with conversation? I just think that because my real life friends know little about the bookish life, our conversations are kind of limited to things that we are all passionate about. However online, I can embarassingly fangirl about my true passion in life, and have people that agree with me. I just want someone in my real life who is as passionate about books as I am.
I don't really think that my real life friends and I have a lot in common hobby wise. We can talk about current issues, school, life etc, but I can't talk about the one thing that basically keeps me going. However online, it just seems like I have a special theme to my conversations with blog buddies and we all share a special trait: we are all readers. It just seems more genuine.
It's weird to say that I enjoy talking to people I've never met more than people in real life, but I think it also has to do with my confidence. I feel less stressed thinking of conversation starters online, and I definitely have a much different persona online than I do in real life.
So do I enjoy my internet friends more? Probably, but of course I still appreciate the friends I have in real life and the bond that we have. I just wish that I could have one, just one friend who is a reader. Those are the best conversations to have in my life :)
So what do you think? Online friends vs. Real life friends?
Emily @ Paperback Princess
I completely agree with you! I feel so much more comfortable talking about really personal things with my closest online friends, because I know they won't judge me, and I trust them 100%. I think I also feel like I can open up more because I know that we're never going to meet (when your best friends live in Canada and Australia :( , so I know they can't do anything about it? Like, I can bitch about people to them, and there's absolutely no way they can tell the people in real life! That sounds weird, but it's true for me, haha.
ReplyDeleteDenise | The Bibliolater
Awww I know!! One of my dreams is to be able to meet one of my over seas blog buddies, but I know that it's highly unlikely :( But they're all a great support system that will agree with us no matter what. I appreciate you, Denise!
DeleteI'm lucky in that the real-life bestie is a reader :) but I appreciate you guys a bunch. Plus it's less awkward for me to talk to a lot of you online, because of the age difference - if I saw you in real life & didn't know you, I wouldn't start a conversation because I'd be overly-conscious of how much younger you are (even though I look about your age... dammit!) :)
ReplyDeleteYeah I totally get that. That's why in a way online friendships are a lot more open, because you can literally be friends with a ton of people regardless of age, ethnicity, etc., where in real life that 's not always possible. And I highly doubt we look the same age lol!
DeleteTrue, I think I look younger than you (don't worry, that's a compliment) ;)
DeleteI feel like both are important :) My real-life friends have a completely different bond, because we share a lot of the same concerns about high school and homework and teachers. But I agree with you that they don't understand my passion for books (my best friend doesn't read very much) and much less my writing. So in that sense I love getting to see how collaborative and kind this book blogging community is.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this post, and thank you for being a great friend!
Thank you too, Kate! Yeah it's not like the friendships I have in real life are bad, they're just different, and that's ok! :)
DeleteThe majority of my friends over the past three years are people who I met online. Luckily, I met one of them and will hopefully have the chance to meet another, as we live in the same country (and not that far apart, either!) I think both are important to have, but as someone who struggles with anxiety it's incredibly hard for me to pluck up the courage to talk to strangers. I find this even online, as well. I never know how to start conversations. Great post!
ReplyDeleteThat's good! I hope you get to meet them :) I find it hard to make conversations with strangers in real life, but not so much online, so I think that's why I feel more comfortable with it.
DeleteThe funny thing for me is that both of my IRL best friends are readers and they even say that I have a special voice when I'm talking about books. They know I blog, but I only have two IRL friends who really know about my activity online.
ReplyDeleteI would have to say that talking to people online is soooo much easier than talking in read life. If it weren't for my blog then I wouldn't have been able to meet a ton of really amazing book lovers and people who I have talked to about some important things. I truly don't know how I would go throughout my days without complaining to Sierra about how I hate my job or bugging her to read the raven cycle.
I think that your online friends can become your best friends, and I'm very okay with that.
I'm very ok with that as well! It's great that you have found best friends in your blogging, and also in real life. Hopefully Sierra will read the Raven Cycle too haha!
DeleteI totally agree with you 100% It is so easy for me to open up online, but in real life I am shy, and even though I love my real life friends, it is hard to tell them anything personal because I feel like they will judge me.
ReplyDeleteIt is hard! I feel like online there is much less of a judgment.
DeleteThis makes so much sense to me! I can be really out-going in real life and sometimes even play the joker (only if everyone else is more awkward than I am) but it's usually an act, you know? Really I'm super introverted and just want to talk books, so I feel very much the same as you do!
ReplyDeleteSee I'm actually the opposite, introverted in real life but way more extroverted online. But you're right, all I want is to be able to talk about books!
DeleteI feel pretty much the same when it comes to fangirling about books. My real life friends don't understand my other passions, so it's nice to have people on internet that share the same interests as you.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I am an introvert both real life and online! I always have a hard time expressing myself, so I feel like everyone sees me as a weirdo online. I'm afraid to sound too superficial or too invasive, so I'm always overanalyzing every comment or tweet. I hope to become better with time!
Great post, Emily!
I think you're doing absolutely fine, Lais! I do overthink as well, but I'm slowly learning to let things go and just enjoy myself online.
DeleteYASSSSS- totally agree with this, Em! Love the topics you choose! I think the main reason is that people in the blogosphere are generally so friendly and accepting- usually even more so than the ones in real life, and you can always talk about literally ANYTHING with them. *shrugs* It has always seemed so for me, anyway. Within the short span of me being a blogger, I've learnt that my blogging buddies are dependable, open, always willing to listen- and to fangirl! I'm sure things might feel different if our real life best friends were into reading too, but since that's not the case, I'm really glad for my logging buddies. Each and every one of you. *heart eyes*
ReplyDeleteBlog buddies are extremely dependable and they can even sometimes help me with my real life friend problems! But you're right, if our real life friends liked reading, I'm sure things would be different. Thanks Ruzaika, the Conversations topics are so creative!
DeleteOops- I kinda mistook this for Paperback's Ponderings- my bad! :D
DeleteHaha no problem, I do a lot of different discussion posts lol :p
Delete