Saturday 23 April 2016

Conversations Week 2: Is 15 Years Old Too Young to be Reading 50 Shades?


Conversations is a fortnightly meme created by Geraldine @ Corralling Books and Joan @ Fiddler Blue with a basic theme and a topic to follow! This week’s theme is popular issues, and the topic is: Is 15 Years Old too Young to be Reading 50 Shades of Grey? 

My answer is a 100% YES! Maybe I can't really have a relevant opinion for this because I haven't read the book, as I am only 16 myself, but I CAN'T IMAGINE anyone younger than at least 17 reading this book. Not only because of the sexual explicitness, but of the deeper problems of abuse and feminism that so many have talked about. 

Obviously the sex in this book is something that is definitely NSFW. Children under my age have very limited knowledge of sex ed depending on their life at home, on social media, etc, and a fictional  erotic book is not going to help them get anywhere! Perhaps if children are very curious and have questions, then they should go to an educated professional suited for their age group, but this book would just bring up many unnecessary awkward conversations. I'm not trying to say that learning about sex ed. is a bad thing, because I actually find it very important for teens to be educated, I just think that the level of sex ed that 50 Shades provides is too much, too fast. 

Elaborating on that point, do you really think that 15 year old's will even understand half the stuff that's going on? It's pretty elaborate and descriptive, and contains themes that I certainly didn't know at 15, and probably am still ignorant about. Like I said before, it's not BAD to be educated, but it's definitely not GOOD  in my opinion to be shoving explicit BDSM down a still developing teenager's throat. 

I think that in this case, ignorance is bliss. Teenagers will learn when they're ready about harder topics like this, but I feel as if it is uncomfortable for both teen and probably their parents to see their child reading this book. 

Now there's the whole themes of domestic/sexual abuse and feminism. Again, I have not read this book, so I don't really know if this book is very abusive, contains rape, or if the girl gave consent, but I have read many articles stating otherwise. I don't think that this book is healthy for any teen to read, as it is a very male-dominated book. What message are we giving to girls, that you should do whatever a hot and rich man tells you to do? 

Erotica doesn't interest me and probably never will interest me, and while teens should make their own choices on what they want to read, I personally would like a limit. You may make an argument that if the parents are ok with it, then it should be ok, but I really am curious how many parents are truly ok with it. This isn't meant to be sarcastic, I really am just curious to their reasoning. 

 I guess it all depends on opinion and the important thing is that we do not call out other people's opinions such as using words like "slut" or "prude", because I see those words come up too often when talking about this book. My opinion is no, but I want to know, is your opinion yes?  

What do you think? Do you agree or disagree with my points? I'd love to know!

Emily @ Paperback Princess


18 comments:

  1. *reads innuendo into innocent statements* *curses dirty mind*

    Yep, I agree Em. Now if only we lived in a world that acted sensibly...

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    1. Lol I think I know what you're talking about and now I'm cursing my choice of words in a topic like this haha! Thanks Cee!

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  2. I read the 50 Shades when I was 17. It's definitely not a book for young readers. It can give them such a misconstrued vision of sex. Mind you, I don't like erotica's either, I read it just for fun. So I guess it depends on the reason you're reading this book also. But I 100% think it's strictly for people who are educated on the topic, the series shouldn't be a learning experience.

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    1. Yeah I totally agree! I think it takes a certian level of education and maturity before taking on a book of this sorts. It shouldn't be used as sex ed for teens.

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  3. I both agree and disagree with you. I feel like 16+ is an okay age, as 16 is the legal age of consent in the UK and I'm a firm believer that if you are old enough to HAVE sex you're old enough to read/watch it. However, I don't condone 50 Shades from what I've heard about it. It's not a source of sex education - which is sadly very lacking in the school system - but I see nothing wrong with curious minds wanting to learn more. IF they're being safe and sensible about it. Erotica probably isn't the place to go for education.

    I do think though, that in our sex obsessed culture, 15 year olds (and younger) know perhaps more than they should about sex. I also think it's sensible to introduce things such as BDSM into sex ed, but not in an erotic or explicit way. If people are educated about these things they won't feel bad if they have a penchant for being restrained, for example, and are less likely to engage in unsafe BDSM practices. Learning about limits, etiquette, and safe words would increase sexual confidence, I'm sure.

    On the topic of abuse: while it INFURIATES me that it's portrayed as healthy and desirable in contemporary lit, it is ultimately down to the reader to really see that and say 'this is not okay and not something I will stand for'. Not to take away from the fact that authors are 100% responsible for the content they write and should consider any and all implications. They can and should be held accountable.

    Mostly though, sex is natural and normal, and if you're mature enough to handle reading about something in an objective way and you aren't pressuring others or putting yourself at risk: you do you.

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    1. Great points Charlotte! 16 is the age of consent here in Canada too, but I still think that teens 16+ should ask themselves if this book would make them uncomfortable, because of course, not all 16 years olds are having sex. The point is for them to ask questions, do research, to help them make responsible decisions and not feel pressured into anything.

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    2. I definitely agree with you there - you have to know your limits and what you can and can't handle, and that's down to no one but yourself. But for those interested there are way more reliable sources out there! Even talking to other people rather than relying on things like this can help you, because at the end of the day erotica is a form of porn, and that's not very educational.

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    3. Exactly! That's what doctors, parents, siblings etc. are there for, for teens to ask them questions before turning to fiction and perhaps more unreliable sources.

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  4. It's so interesting to hear your thoughts on this! I think the themes in this book definitely make it something that could be unsettling for young people. I think it'd be unsettling to me!
    And we should consider what this teaches people about relationships.
    But at the same time - some (hopefully not too many) 15 year-olds are having sex at that age, and just like a lot of other things - it's not something parents or society can really control effectively. So I don't think we can tell people what they should or shouldn't read. As much as we might like to.
    I'm genuinely not comfortable with people reading something like Fifty Shades and making it into such a big deal - I mean, when a movie comes out and the adults seem to think it's really cool, what's a teenager to think?
    Oh my gosh, I'm totally writing an essay in your comments! Sorry! I do agree with you, very much! And I'm really glad we're all talking about this topic today :)

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    1. No no I love the essays! There's so much to say on this topic! Relationship education is obviously so impenitent, because teens shouldn't be given false information on their expectations on relationships. It makes me uncomfortable, but perhaps some have just higher limits than me.

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    2. Definitely - there's so much to say! It makes me uncomfortable too. Like, I don't think I'd like reading Fifty Shades even now, as an adult. But especially at a younger age, depictions of relationships can be super important!

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  5. Fifteen is definitely way too young for a book like Fifty Shades, and I do agree with you when you say ignorance is bliss, Emily! For anyone curious about such topics, there are way better, informative, safe sources than a book like this which not only has explicit content, but also promotes unhealthy relationships. Just the thought of fifteen-year-olds reading this makes me squirm and wish there was some way this could be controlled, But sadly, with the way the world is today, that's so not achievable. We have as much control over this as we do about world peace. Go figure.

    Ruzaika @ The Regal Critiques

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    1. It is kind of sad that teens have access to these things! I guess all we can do is train those younger than us to be responsible, but sadly there's always going to be problems :(

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  6. I'm going to have to disagree with you on this one. I think it depends on that 15 year old. There are some 15 year olds who are quite mature for their age and able to handle such topics, such as I was at that age. I was reading new adult with some pretty hardcore sex scenes, and I was able to get pass them. I also think that presently kids are being exposed to sex at younger ages, even engaging in it. I think as long as the kid is able to read the books and analyze it enough to see that they shouldn't strive for the relationship the book is trying to portray, they should be able to read it. A lot of people underestimate some young teens.

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    1. You're right, some teens are definitely more mature than others, however I just find it personally uncomfortable to be reading such an explicit book at such a young age. Like I said, it all depends on the person's limits, but sadly a lot of teens can be pressured into reading something because it's trendy on social media, and not staying in their limits.

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    2. I never thought about them being pressured into reading it. Yeah, if they are being pressured, they definitely shouldn't read it. They should only read it if they really want to.

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  7. Yes. 100% yes. 15 year old is not mature enough to understand and take responsibilty for those kind of things. They might not understand that it's fictional, and it's bad, and if it happened in real life it would count as abuse. And aside from the explicit sex contents, the girls might started to think and even idiolized Christian Grey as ideal boyf, which is really creepy. It's just give such a wrong idea about healthy relationships. I also never interested in Erotica. I just don't understand the appeal of it.

    The Literary Huntress

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    1. I guess some people find it to be like a kind of "guilty pleasure", but with this day and age and 50 Shades being such a social trend, teens just look at the hot guy on the cover and think, "I want a relationship just like that"! You can't really control it.

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